More Fun Than a Barrel of 100 Monkeys

Well, this is it. The 100th post of Comic Monkey. I thought it best to post a heartwarming story about love and affection in the land of what else...monkeys.

No matter where you go, I will find you!

2 monkeys on the run. On the run to find each other. It's a monkey love so strong, that we dare not speak its name. One, Bruno, the male orangutan in a Los Angeles zoo, punched through his mesh trappings and escaped. Bruno could not be deterred on his quest to reunite with, Luna Bella, the female orangutan that escaped at about the same time from a zoo in Tampa. Unfortunately, before a cross country trip across the country to find his young lover, Bruno was caught up in a different holding area at the zoo and recovered. This left all of the work in Bella's court. How would her quest work out in the end? Bella found herself faced with the ultimate choice. Running towards a monkey rendez vous, or the apples, carrots and ice cream being offered by the trainers. In the end, the food won, and she returned to her pen without trouble. Incidently, this worked out pretty well for Bruno, because he's 29 and she's only 10, so he was going to be looking at getting handed a hard 10 to 20 years of monkey justice if he'd found her.

Los Angeles: Dirtiest Air, Cleanest Water

In tribute to Oscar Night, I bring you the results of another highly anticipated awards ceremony.  The Berkeley Springs International Water Tasting.  Envelope please....

And the award goes to...the Los Angeles area.  Wait a minute, Los Angeles?

Southern California finds a way to keep the smog and pollution out of the water.  The award for Best Municipal Water 2008 was given to Metropolitan Water District of Southern California.  They serve a few areas, including Los Angeles.  How is one of the dirtiest polluted cities spewing forth the cleanest water?  The city donates 2 gallons of their best water to this contest each year.  Imagine being a judge on this panel.  They have to rate each one on taste, odor, mouth feel and after taste.  Now, clearly I'm no expert, but should any water really have an odor or a nasty after taste?  Seriously?  If i took a sip of anything remotely rancid and containing an out of the ordinary scent/taste, I think the city officials would find themselves wearing all 2 gallons of the donated water.  Also, what is "mouth feel?"  I think water should have two very simple feels.  I want it to feel cool and refreshing.  I certainly don't want there to be anything prickly or rough or smooth.  Nothing should be feeling up the inside of mouth, while I enjoy a glass of water.  

Most importantly, where are the votes for my hometown New York City water?  Sure, it's sometimes got a chlorine like taste to it, and occasionally you've got to let the faucet run a few extra seconds until the the water stops looking brown, but damn is it ever tasty.